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Political Gaffe: our own political circus

If you’re hoping to be politically enlightened by reading this blog, then please proceed to our news section instead.

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First, let me clear a few things:

  1. No, I was not paid by any of the candidates
  2. No, I’m not voting for Mar
  3. No, I do not support Duterte

If you’re hoping to be politically enlightened by reading this blog, then please proceed to our news section instead. The primary purpose of this list-post is to make fun and expose the political circus that’s happening right now.

 

  1. The unnecessary tension 

 Here is the compressed and edited version of their moronic banter:

Duterte: Ay pag nakita ko yan sampalin ko ng tsinelas ni Korina ‘yan.

Mar: Sampalan? Parang hindi naman kami lalaki. Gusto niya sapakan na lang kami.

Duterte: Ayoko na, hindi ko na papatulan ‘yan. Patunayan niya munang tuli na siya.

Mar: Wala akong kailangan patunayan. Tuli ako. Tanong mo pa si Pnoy.

 

  1. Curious case of Binay’s Thesis

Educational attainment and raw experience are important when one is vying for a position in government, (who am I kidding? Look at Manny Pacquiao and Lito Lapid: walking ironies) that’s why Thomasians went crazy when the Varsitarian broke the news that Binay didn’t finish his degree here in UST.

Binay, however, deflected this issue with an air tight excuse that would probably put James Moriarty to shame:

Non-verbatim: “Hindi ko natapos degree ko kase may bumasag sa salamin ng kotse ko tapos ninakaw ‘yong thesis ko. Eh syempre noong panahon na ‘yon hindi pa uso ang computer kaya wala akong back up.”

Question: Who would go through all that trouble just to steal someone’s thesis?

 

  1. Appearance 112: How not to eat and how not to appear like an idiot
  • Remember your composure and position. It’s very unwise to say this to a reporter while being viewed live on national TV: “Ano, gusto mo samahan pa kita bumili ng drugs?
  • If there’s no available plate, then find an available saucer, and vice versa. If that fails, find a banana leaf. Just. Don’t. Eat. Rice. Using. A. Cup. With. A. Ladle. As. Your. Spoon.
  • It is simply idiotic to drink soup with a plate.

 

  1. #ConfidentlyMasikip: First National Debate kuno

Debate highlights:

  • Mar be like “jsbfjjfbhebfjwenfjwef… at yan po ang daang matuwid na ating ipagpapatuloy”
  • Question: Ano po magagawa niyo para sa ekonomiya ng Pilipinas? Binay: Napaganda ko po ang Makati. Punta po tayo sa Makati.
  • Guess who: “Psh Kriminal? 3-6 months linis yan – ask me how.”
  • Poe was so calm and collected, that she can probably tell you she murdered your family and you would still feel at peace.
  • Mar: *says something*

Duterte: *screams internally* mababaril ko na ‘to

  • Miriam walks to the podium

Ruffles her hair

Fixes her lapel

Raises her hands to the skies

SAAN NATIN KUKUNIN ANG PERA

 

  1. Binay’s political suicide

The two statements that put the nail in his own coffin:

“Alam niyo naman na ako laki sa hirap naranasan ko ‘yan. Katulad ng nanay ko namatay dahil sa kahirapan”

“Hindi naman porket nasa gobyerno kami wala na kaming pwedeng gawin para kumita. Saka ‘yong iba naman diyan nabili namin, ‘yong iba naman namana ko.”

 

  1. Because why the hell would you use your own money? That’s ridiculous!

 “Poe’s son using his own hard-earned money to buy his own shoes?! That’s absurd! That money probably came from solicited funds from the big companies controlling Poe!”

 

Ignoring the satire, I urge you to develop your own opinion. Don’t be swayed by your friends, family, or the mainstream media.

Do your own research, be knowledgeable of each candidate’s stand on issues plaguing this country.

Wikipedia is not a valid source, don’t be lazy.

Look at Miriam Defensor; I am always in awe whenever she appears on the news. Her inteligence, credentials and infamy precedes her. Recently, however, when asked about her take on Martial Law, she said the Marcos’ did it for the betterment of the country. Unfortunately, that was the biggest downer for me since they cancelled Heroes.

And now look at Mar: he is mangling his own campaign, making it easier for the other candidates. What kind of presidential candidate would offer to accompany you, on national TV, to buy drugs?

Binay, on the other hand, is keeping it cool on the surface. But I bet he knows the instability he brought to his campaign because of his statements regarding his alleged ill-gotten wealth. Tips? Feel the lie. Practice the lie. Be the lie.

For you special group of people – go bash me, it won’t make any difference – Duterte is no magic. You can’t “decriminalize” a country as large as ours within 6 months.

Say he does manage to clean our rancid country, but at what cost? Shoot now, ask later? He said he will abide by the law. Well surprise, extra judicial killing is against the law. If he is to abide, 6 months would not be enough because due process takes time, just as it is in other parts of the world. Keep your #Du30 in your pants, I’ve seen better.

Grace Poe has her plans, but can she successfully accomplish them? I admire her passion but it won’t be enough. She says “itutuloy ko ang nasimulan ng aking tatay,” but honestly, what will she continue? His stunts? Then be an action star.

 

PS. Know the candidates. Do thorough research. Determine if they mean every promises or simply saying it to please the people.

PPS. Read the news article before commenting. It would make you less stupid tenfold.

PPPS. It doesn’t mean that if I despise one party, I uphold the other. I hate what happened during Marcos’ reign, but I also hate that Cory did little to nothing to revive our dying country. Stop saying “na brainwash ka ng banderang dilaw” or “siguro bayaran ka no.”

PPPPS. What is it with candidates in continuing the “legacy” of their predecessors?

Leni: Tatapusin/itutuloy ko ang nasimulan ng aking asawa

Mar: Itutuloy ko ang daang matuwid

Poe: Ipagpapatuloy ko ang gawain ng aking ama

Binay: Itutuloy ko ang mga nagawa ko sa Makati

 

Why are they so driven to continue these olden ideas? Why can’t they be their own man? Daang Matuwid is riddled with controversies and ineptitude. Makati is a city, not a country. Whatever your husband or your father did was surely commendable, but we’re talking about the present here.

We can’t afford to waste another six years. Man up and do your country a favor.

 

 

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‘Yoko’ by Eraserheads is Relevant Now, More Than Ever

This is how the iconic 90s Filipino rock band Eraserheads described their experience with the Citizens’ Military Training program through ‘Yoko’ back in the days.

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Photo taken from Bandwagon | Edited by Daffy Bara

After 17 years of mandatory Reserve Officers’ Training Corps (ROTC) program being rescinded, Congress is now fast-tracking the passage of a bill that would make the program a requisite again, at least for grades 11 and 12.

It has since been answered by condemnation and protests from student and youth groups, especially from Thomasian students whose fellow Thomasian Mark Welson Chua suffered from its abuses for simply ratting out the corruption inside the UST ROTC system.

With President Rodrigo Duterte certified as urgent Senate Bill No. 2232 on Monday, July 3, requiring senior high school students to undergo the ROTC program, ‘Yoko’ by Eraserheads captured today’s youth’s sentiment against the bill’s passage making it relevant now, more than ever.

Behind the song

 

“Nasayang ang maghapon, ano ang napala?
Basura sa utak, sunburn sa batok at noo
Nagmamartsang parang gago sa ilalim ng araw
Baril na kahoy pinapaikot-ikot parang langaw”

 

Seems familiar? This is how the first verse of the 1995 hit ‘Yoko’ went as the iconic 90s Filipino rock band Eraserheads described through the song their experiences in the Citizens’ Military Training (CMT) program back in the days.

Written by drummer/vocalist Raymund Marasigan and performed by Eraserheads, ‘Yoko’ or a Filipino slang for ‘Ayaw ko’ meaning ‘I don’t want’ talks about contempt for “unnecessary and routinely outdoor activities, blind obedience, false sense of nationalism, and abuse” inside then-CMT (a.k.a. ROTC) program, a college counterpart of the infamous Citizens’ Army Training (CAT) program in high school.

Released as part of Cutterpillow in 1995, ‘Yoko’ was said to have contributed to the call to abolish the ROTC program back in the 2000s as students’ clamor pressure Congress through demonstrations and parliamentary struggle.

Cutterpillow, the band’s third studio album, is still one of the biggest selling album in OPM history. It sold more than 400,000 copies (the record turned Gold on the day of its release, and Platinum on its first week). It was the fastest selling album in the 90s era.

Eraserheads is known to have introduced classic songs such as “Huling El Bimbo”, “Overdrive”, “Kaliwete”, and “Huwag Mo Nang Itanong” in the OPM arena.

Now that ROTC is making a comeback, let’s make sure that they hear our calls, if not in the streets, through songs of Filipino band legends they’re definitely into.

You can listen to the full song on Spotify.

 

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8 Apps that will kick start your university life

Still struggling to keep track of your deadlines? Check out these 8 apps that can help “Marie Kondo” your student life in order.

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Let’s admit it–it’s either too bulky to bring around or too hassle to maintain your favorite bullet journal or planner, especially if you’re a student whose time is consumed by the horrible metro traffic. But with only our smartphones in our hands, it is much easier to track and manage your study schedules and to do lists.

As we’re about to face again the looming deadlines, don’t forget to equip yourself with these apps to help you kickstart your semester.

Google Calendar can help you keep track of your events. Giving you the option to view your personalized calendar in daily, weekly or monthly spread, you can easily see your schedule with just one glance. You don’t need to worry about forgetting a single thing because users can set an alarm to remind them at various intervals.

   

Unlike the first one on the list, Ike is more comprehensive in classifying your goals. The app is designed after the Eisenhower Matrix which categorizes each task based on the importance, urgency, and aspect in life that you want to improve on. With the four categories, Focus, Goals, Fit In, or Important, you can easily set your agenda

All of us have been victimized by the “pahinga lang ako ng 5 minutes” because the next thing you know, you’re endlessly scrolling through memes for the last three hours.

This app utilizes the Pomodoro technique where you will use a timer to break down work into intervals with short breaks. With the help of Forest, tracking productivity is at the fingertips of the user. The user can decide how much time he/she wants to be focus. And to motivate you more, for every completed task, a tree will sprout in your forest.  However, if the user gets distracted by notification and leave the app, the plant will immediately die.

For those who travel from their hometown all the way to the University, turn your wasted time being stuck in traffic to a productive study session in your phone. Quizlet allows the user to assess their knowledge and retention of user through flash cards where the front contains the term and in the back is its definition. Various quiz types such as written, matching type, multiple choice, and true or false questions are also featured in this app.

Ace that paper that you’re about to write with Grammarly Keyboard. This app can detect grammatical errors from spelling to punctuations, while you’re typing! This nifty app can be used in various applications such as Facebook, Gmail, Twitter or anywhere you need to type on.

It is disappointing to say but daily student life would never be complete without spending hours of traffic congestion in España–and it would be a much burden if you have a group paper to pass but guess what? You’re still stuck there.

But thanks to this old trusty pal, Google Docs, you can write that paper even with just your mobile phone. Your progress will be safely stored in the Cloud and your group mates can easily track your revisions.

Truth be told, Thomasians can never run out of places to eat–but after all that endless munching, our stomachs’ next stop is to find that perfect bathroom. BGPOP and Central Lab is the place to be, but when we’re out of our comfort places, San Bidet? is here to save the day. This app will guide you to the nearest toilet with that sweet bidet.

For someone who did not grow up in Metro Manila, getting to a specific location could be a struggle (not to mention if you are kind who does not have a sense of direction swear it could be trouble.) But with the sakay.ph app, just enter your destination and ta-da you will see the comprehensive information on how can you reach your destination whether it is via jeepney, bus or train. It also provides how long it would trip would take.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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8 New Year’s Eve traditions that only Filipinos can understand

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Art by Jessica Lopez

It is truly in the heart of Filipino tradition to celebrate New Year with an extra level of effort and extravagance. From the endless varieties of food set on our tables, to the myriad gatherings of family and friends, up to the ear-splitting explosion of firecrackers and fireworks that trail the night sky, we definitely know how to party hard.

But this celebration would never be complete without the bizarre yet unique traditions that most Pinoy households take part in just to ensure good fortune for the coming year.

 

  1. Round fruits = ka-ching!

Who can miss that basket of round fruits your mother set at the center of your dining table? Beware though, trying to steal a fruit or two may bring you misfortune in the form of an angry mother.

In both Filipino and Chinese traditions, circles are symbols for prosperity. Because of this, Filipinos generally decorate their dining tables with varieties of round fruits such as oranges, grapes, watermelons, apples and many more.

  1. The family that eats sticky rice together, stays forever

Biko, puto, tikoy and the like are staple food for any Filipino feast, especially during Christmas season and  New Year’s Eve. But aside from it being commonly served in celebrations, sticky rice or kakanin symbolizes a sweeter and stronger bond between family members.

  1.  Noodles for a longer life

Noodles are also a staple food we usually see during our New Year’s feast. This tradition of eating noodles during Media Noche, which is said to be adopted by the early Filipinos from the Chinese, is thought to bring good health, longevity, and good fortune for the next year.

  1. No chicken and fish dishes during Media Noche

According to elders, serving chicken and fish dishes during the midnight dinner entails bad fortune for the next year. For most Pinoys, avoiding chicken and fish prevents them from being situated in the adage – “isang kahig, isang tuka”, which means that one will earn just enough for a meal and nothing more.

 

  1. Coins inside the pocket

Another thing that Filipinos do to attract money is keeping coins inside their pockets and shaking it when the midnight falls. Another thing which surely every child anticipates is the “money shower”. You might remember the times when your parents carried a handful or bagful of coins in their hands and sprinkled it onto the floor in every corner of your house which you and your siblings would snatch from afterwards. Both traditions are intended to bring wealth, and symbolize the continuous flow of money into one’s household.

 

  1.  Jumping in the hopes of putting on a few more inches

No one would probably want to miss out on a chance of adding a few inches to their height, especially if all it takes are few jumps when midnight strikes.

Every year, you always see children jumping (and even a few college students) as high as they can with excitement plastered on their faces. This jumping-during-midnight is mostly  done by little kids, though, there are still adults who might feel the need to do it. Those who practice jumping are believed to grow taller over the course of the year.

 

  1.  Wearing clothes with polka dots

As with the belief that round fruits will bring prosperity, so will dressing in clothes with polka dot patterns. Usually seen on children more than adults, the polka dots are said to resemble coins, and thus stand for good fortune.

Maybe we can try add polka dots to our daily wardrobe and somehow un~broke~ ourselves.

 

  1. Ear-splitting firecrackers and firework displays

Celebrating New Year wouldn’t be thrilling without the presence of loud booms and cracks of various fireworks in the sky and on the streets. Setting off fireworks is believed to drive away evil spirits, ensuring that they’re nowhere near people’s homes as they usher in the new year. Consequently, the streets during New Year’s Eve often come close to feeling like the middle of a warzone, but that’s never gotten in the way of any Filipino’s celebrations. Just be careful on those firecrackers though, you might need those complete set of fingers in the future.

Filipinos truly know how to welcome the New Year in their own way. Although some may appear strange, it just make every occasion even more exciting and memorable.

 

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